First, my friend Jeff Porten shows what happens when you eat lamb chops while listening to Elton John:

Bo combs my fleece next morn adorned
Zero hour six AM
And I’m gonna be munching grass and straw till then
The NASA satellite was low and tight
That caught my sheepskin fuzz
Ovis aries meets Ares

And I think it’s gonna be a long long time
Got four legs waving in the air sublime
I’m not the lamb they think is all alone
Oh no no no. I’m a rocket lamb.
Rocket lamb, glad I’m wearing wool ’cause it’s awf’ly cold.

Mars ain’t the kind of place to raise your kids
Leave them with the goats’ next door
Or their heads will bug out bad like Arnold’s did.
I see Spirit stuck there, down in the sand
In space there’s no one to hear you bleat
A rocket lamb, a rocket lamb.

And this orbit is still stuck on full repeat
No fancy gyroscope gives me a sign
I’d be better off as gyro meat
Oh no no no no no. I’m a rocket lamb.
Rocket lamb, Peep has no business raising sheep

Not to be outdone, Steve Walsh responded with this Paul McCartney tribute:

Well the grain exploded with a mighty crash, as we leapt over the trough,
And the first one said to the second one, “baaah”
Lamb on the run, lamb on the run,
And the farmer man and the upholstery stand, were searching everyone,

For the lamb on the run, lamb on the run, lamb on the run, lamb on the run

Well the shearer drew a heavy sigh, seeing no spool of wool had come,
And a bell was ringing in the village square, for the rabbits on the run
[NOTE: actual line!]
Lamb on the run, lamb on the run.

OK, so the first one is cute, but the second one is a challenge. So at that point, I turn to Billy Joel for inspiration:

There’s nine in our flock on a Saturday
But yesterday it was ten
There’s a sheep dog standing next to me
Making sure no one else leave the pen

He says, “Son, you appear to be musical
which for you, might seem quite absurd
But if you would please bleat a song that is sweet
Then I can keep track of this herd

baa baa baa, b- b- baa baa
baa baa, b- b- baa, baa baaaaaaaaaaaaa

Sing us a song, you’re the piano lamb
Sing us a song right now
’cause Mary is peeved I let one of you leave
and now she’s stuck eating the cow..

So there you go. Three guys writing song parodies who aren’t the least bit sheepish…

(Too much? Yeah, you’re right. Sorry…)

Obviously, these are both wonderful causes, so I’m comparing only music videos here.

I guess I’m predisposed to prefer the original, since it’s how I first heard the song, and contains a larger percentage of artists that I know and/or identify with. That said, the new version is growing on me. I’m surprised by how much I like the rap breaks, both in the middle and at the end. I think what Wyclef Jean did with Creole lyrics and singing style went a long way toward making this an effort in Haitian relief, and not just a remake of the original song. I like the way they incorporated Michael Jackson into it (the image of Janet singing next to her brother is the first tribute to his legacy that doesn’t feel commercialized in some way), and I love the Ray Charles impression that Jamie Foxx threw in to honor another of the original’s stand-out artists.

On the other hand, I’m mystified about why they changed the lyrics to one of the verses (was there a religious objection to “As God has shown us by turning stone to bread?”). I’m surprised by Celine Dion’s choice to imitate, note for note, what Cyndi Lauper did with her part (with apparent coaching from Lionel Richie?), rather than bringing her own interpretation to the song. I think teen sensation, Justin Bieber, is going to get a big bump in face-recognition from singing the first solo (“There comes a time…”), but that most people will conclude that his voice was too weak to handle it. And I’m deeply, deeply troubled by the acceptance of auto-tune as a musical choice by folks Lil Wayne and others. If melodic singing isn’t his thing, then find someone else to do Bob Dylan’s part, please? That, or for heaven’s sake, someone please improve the auto-tune technology so it doesn’t sound like a robot attempting to sing such soulful lyrics!

In the end, I still prefer the original, but I’m glad they both exist. And if the new one is nearly as successful as the original in raising money for a good cause, then I’m doubly glad they put in the time and effort.

Attention 40-something year-old men: you may now commence picturing Carrie Underwood in a metal bikini. That is all…

Adam Lambert emerged from his #2 finish on American Idol as one of the most promising singing talents in years. At the American Music Awards, he decided to make his performance a social statement, rather than make it about the music. He’s since been cancelled by ABC from Good Morning America, Jimmy Kimmel Live, and New Year’s Rockin’ Eve. And the shows that are letting him on suddenly want to talk about nothing else but the AMA’s. I’m disappointed. Not because I have a particular opinion about his “cause,” but because he’s allowed his cause to overshadow his music, which I was looking forward to enjoying. On the upside, I think maybe he’s realizing his mistake. Here’s what he told Ellen Degeneres:

It was maybe a little too far. I think in hindsight I look back on it and I go, “OK, maybe that wasn’t the best first impression to make again, the first second impression.” I mean, I had fun up there, I had a good time, my dancers had fun and the band had fun. I respect people and feel like people walked away from that feeling disrespected. I would never intend to disrespect anybody. So that was not my intention.

What he needs now is a musical “reset” – another spotlight moment, like the AMA’s, in which he knocks everyone’s socks off musically, and convinces people that music is his thing, not social commentary.

Tiger Woods released the following statement yesterday:

[N]o matter how intense curiosity about public figures can be, there is an important and deep principle at stake which is the right to some simple, human measure of privacy. I realize there are some who don’t share my view on that. But for me, the virtue of privacy is one that must be protected in matters that are intimate and within one’s own family. Personal sins should not require press releases and problems within a family shouldn’t have to mean public confessions.

Whatever regrets I have about letting my family down have been shared with and felt by us alone. I have given this a lot of reflection and thought and I believe that there is a point at which I must stick to that principle even though it’s difficult.

I wish every celebrity in the world would memorize these two paragraphs and recite them whenever some nosy reporter presumes to suggest that his/her private life is somehow my business.

Tiger had a car accident and knocked over a fire hydrant. He needs to explain that to the police, and hence, to the public. If someone were knocking over fire hydrants in my neighborhood, I’d want to know who, where and why. That’s a public safety issue and a law enforcement issue. However, if the answer to “Why?” is “domestic dispute” or “private matter,” then I have no need or desire to know more.

Michaele and Tareq Salahi are the latest in a series of Reality TV inspired stupidity. Years ago, people would do dumb things to get noticed, to be sure, but the result was rarely more than the standard fifteen minutes of fame. Today, with the institutional backing (and financing) of a Reality TV Show’s production company, exhibitionists like these have the capability of distracting the entire nation for fifteen days, not fifteen minutes. The Salahi’s, like the Balloon Boy family before them, only benefit from their actions if they get caught. And even though the news media knows this, they play right into the perpetrators’ hands, because they also know that it sells soap. My only hope is that the largely negative reaction to both the Salahi’s and the Heene’s dissuade Reality TV producers from pulling stunts like this in the future. Because the media is certainly not going to show any restraint.

HBO recently aired the Rock & Roll Hall of Fame’s 25th Anniversary Concert. Culling through two nights of music, they presented a “mere” four hours of musical genius, ranging from Stevie Wonder to Simon & Garfunkel to Aretha Franklin to Crosby, Stills & Nash to U2 to Metallica to Bruce Springsteen and the E Street Band. Add to that a truly amazing array of “guest stars,” such as James Taylor, Joe Cocker, Smokey Robinson, Sting, BB King, Bonnie Rait, and Billy Joel. As I watch these folks float on and off the Madison Square Garden stage, all I can think is, “These are the masters that today’s musical acts can only dream of approximating.” I’m not a fan of every musical style in the show, but the amount of raw musical talent on display is so far and away beyond the artists of today, that one wonders what the 50th Anniversary show could possibly have to offer. Maybe it’s just my age showing…

Last night at Giants Stadium, Bruce Springsteen and the E Street Band put on a three-hour extravaganza that proved conclusively that adrenaline can power a rock & roll band every bit as much as an electric guitar.

Billed as his farewell to Giants Stadium (a new Giants Stadium is nearing completion in the parking lot next door, and will open for business with next year’s football season), Bruce and the band powered through twenty-eight songs (setlist), providing the required momentum for the near-perpetual motion machine that is his loyal fan base.

The show began with a song written especially for the occasion, Wrecking Ball. While poignant and apropos of the occasion, all but the most diehard Bruce fans will, I’m guessing, admit that this song is a mess – with rambling lyrics that hardly rhyme, no melody to speak of, and a barely passable chorus. It reminded me right away of Freedom, the sub-standard song Paul McCartney wrote for the Concert for New York City back in 2001.

But after that formality, the stadium lights went down and the real show began. First, there were four songs from Bruce’s massive catalog, including what has become one of his audience participation pieces, Hungry Heart. Then, the centerpiece for the evening – for each of these Giants Stadium shows, Bruce has been picking an album to play in its entirety. Past nights have featured Darkness on the Edge of Town and Born to Run, but this show’s feature was Born in the U.S.A.. I’m not sure how the Springsteen faithful felt about the choice, but I certainly enjoyed it, given that Born in the U.S.A. was the first Springsteen album that made me aware of his music back in the 1980’s. They played all twelve songs without so much as a word in between, pausing only briefly between songs so Bruce could swap out guitars. When it was over, Bruce and the band took a bow, taking a moment to mention Danny Federici, the only non-surviving contributor to the album, who passed away in April of 2008.

The show continued with five more catalog hits, culminating in Born to Run, which brought the few in the crowd who had dared to sit down back to their feet. After that, a “by request” song, which involved Bruce walking amongst the floor seat crowd & taking a handful of their homemade signs, many of which said Jersey Girl. Of course, there were enough choices amongst the myriad of signs in the audience, that it was really Bruce who chose the song, not the crowd, but no one seemed to notice or care about that little technicality.

The show ended with five more numbers, including Kitty’s Back, an honest-to-goodness roadhouse blues number that featured some amazing keyboard and organ work by Roy Bittan, and a fantastic trumpet solo by a guy I didn’t recognize (anybody?), something called Detroit Medley which included classic, non-Springsteen hits like Devil with a Blue Dress On and Good Golly, Miss Molly, American Land, Waiting on a Sunny Day – another audience participation piece, and finally, the classic Thunder Road.

As was the case with other Springsteen shows I’ve attended, I was impressed with the man’s stamina and showmanship. In the first set, he walked through the crowd to a small podium about a third of the way across the floor seats, and then “crowd surfed” back to the stage. At other times, he bounded across the wide stage, shaking hands with fans in the front rows, and allowing them to paw at his legs and feet while he sang. Three times during the show, he brought children onto the stage to sing or dance with him, including one little girl who was holding a sign that read “13th Birthday Dance????” and an even younger, adorable little blond girl (age 9 or 10?) who sang the chorus to Waiting on a Sunny Day as a solo in front of 70,000+ people, all while chewing on her gum and staring up at Bruce.

Despite all of this energy, it is still apparent that Bruce and his buddies are getting older (Bruce turned sixty this past September). The sweat that was pouring off of him, especially in the beginning of the night, made me wonder if he was going to make it through the show. Occasionally, he would take a breath during a song, and allow the (willing) audience to fill in the lyric for him. Max Weinberg, his fifty-eight year old drummer, was exhaling forcefully throughout the set as if to say, “Man….this hurts!” and would occasionally stop playing with one hand to get himself a drink of water. Clarence Clemons, who I was surprised to learn is now sixty-seven years old, stayed fixed to one spot on the stage. When the band finished its Born in the U.S.A. run-through, they had to awkwardly gather on the side of the stage around Clemons to take their bow. All of that said, though, the advancing age of the performers hasn’t taken a single thing away from the music itself, which sounded as energetic and fresh as it did on the original recordings, or in past shows I’ve seen.

Speaking of age, I feel the need to mention that Bruce and the band aren’t the only ones getting up there in years. Conservatively, I’d say the average age in the crowd was between 35 and 40, lowered only by the fact that several of the fans had brought their young children to the show. One kid, who couldn’t have been more than six years old, had a shirt on that read “My first Bruce concert.” The parent, though, admitted that it actually wasn’t his first (it was his second), but that he liked wearing the shirt.

As a more casual fan of Springsteen than many in attendance (read: sober), it was obvious to me that this is a symbiotic relationship. Bruce isn’t gaining many new fans these days. He and the band are an aging group of folks, playing classic Rock & Roll music to an aging group of fans. And Bruce knows it. When the show ended, he thanked the crowd for their years of support and asked them to “thank their friends” as well. They have a simple, unwritten contract – he keeps recording and performing live, and they keep buying the music and the concert tickets. Everyone has a great time, and they all go happily into retirement with their old and familiar friends.

Long live Rock & Roll…

Avery’s goal: to play The Red and the Blue with the Penn Band at Homecoming (November 7 against Princeton). Lessons have begun!

(NOTE: Click on the picture (or click here) to see a brief slideshow of pictures)

It’s the brainchild of American record producer (and bassist on the recording), Don Was. The site also has the MP3 available for free download.

(Hat tip: Jason Bennion)

…the 1940’s or 1950’s, you think: Woodstock – 3 Days of Peace & Music

…the 1960’s or 1970’s, you think: The Partridge Family – Come on, Get Happy!

…the 1980’s or 1990’s, you think: Twitter for Guitar?

(NOTE: This post inspired by a certain cousin of mine, who shall, at least for now, remain nameless…)
 

The article calls it the biggest mobile event in history:

AOL consumer adviser Regina Lewis . . .told CNN that, although the numbers weren’t in yet, the day should prove an historic milestone for mobile internet traffic. “It could go down as the biggest mobile event in history,” Lewis said. She felt that was down in part to people checking news headlines from work. “People wanted to keep tabs on this story, but if you’re an accountant you’re supposed to be working on your spreadsheet. So they were using their personal cellphones to do so,” she explained.

While the scale of response to Jackson’s death might be unprecedented, the pattern of it was not, Lewis added. “With the advent of social networking, we saw a sequence that we traditionally see around the death of celebrities,” she said. “One, people clamour for the latest news; two, they share it; three, they react; and then the next stage, which we’re seeing alive and well on video sites … are tributes. In the case of Michael Jackson and Farah Fawcett, (people have) a lot to work with in terms of images and video,” she said.

A similar event that comes to mind (purely from an infromation technology point of view) is September 11, 2001. On that day, cell phones and web sites had huge outages as well, with some web sites reverting to plain text feeds in order to maximize their use of bandwidth to get information disseminated.

What’s different here, is that almost eight years later, the number of mobile devices in the world has dramatically increased, as has the breadth and depth of bandwidth-hogging rich media, like video clips. So, while scaling to handle another 9/11 involved adding more web servers and IP bandwidth, solving this problem is going to be a bit more complex. Network infrastructure folks, responding to Michael Jackson’s death, will have to respond to a wider variety of devices, protocols, and data objects moving around concurrently.

Yet another way Michael Jackson inadvertently changed the world…

R.I.P.: Ed McMahon, Farrah Fawcett, Michael Jackson