The title of this post is an actual headline at MSNBC.com (as opposed to, say, The Onion).

Here's the pull quote:

LOS ANGELES - Dolly Parton's breasts may be two of the wonders of the entertainment world, but the country music icon says they are a pain in her back.

Parton, 62, said on Monday she would postpone her upcoming North American tour after doctors told her to take it easy for six to eight weeks to rest her sore back.

"Hey, you try wagging these puppies around a while and see if you don't have back problems," the folksy singer-songwriter said in a statement.

Has anyone else noticed that the person most directly responsible for Dolly Parton's famous breasts is . . . Dolly Parton? Especially now that she's 62 years old, and the world has folks, like Pamela Anderson and Paris Hilton, who promote their breasts by making "accidental" porno videos with their boyfriends, rather than just talking about them all the time?

Not that I'm suggesting Dolly needs a new marketing strategy. I've seen all I need to see, thank you very much...