The World Wide Weird
Idiot’s Guide to Digital Cameras
Thursday, April 2nd, 2009Tomorrow, I embark on an important, secret mission. What is it, you may ask? Well, if I told you, it wouldn’t be a secret, now would it? Suffice to say that it’s important enough that today, I bought a brand new digital camera. And so tomorrow night, when it’s all over, I hope to have pictures and video to share with you about the results of said mission. Try to stay glued to your seats…
In the meantime, some idiocy from the folks who brought you the Quick Start Guide for the Nikon Coolpix L20:
So, let’s review, shall we? The second step in the quick start guide is entitled “First Steps.” The first step is, and I’m quoting directly from the text here, “Take the Camera Out of the Box.”
So here’s what I’m thinking: the true idiocy here doesn’t reside with the authors of the manual. The true idiocy belongs to the dozens of people who called the help desk and said, “Hello? Yes….I just purchased your camera – the Coolpix L20? I’m sitting here with the box on my desk, and I’m not sure what to do next. Can you help me?”
Makes me think of these guys:
Categories: The World Wide Weird | 2 Comments »
Plane Food – Anything but Plain
Thursday, March 26th, 2009It’s been a while since I travelled for work, but the occasion has arisen once again, compelling me to use my employer’s online travel service. In doing so, I took note of the food choices available to me on my (Continental Airlines) flight:
| - standard | - vegetarian lacto-ovo | ||
| - vegetarian | - low protein | ||
| - asian vegetarian | - low sodium | ||
| - raw vegetarian | - gluten free | ||
| - fruit plate | - high fiber | ||
| - seafood | - diabetic | ||
| - kosher | - non-lactose | ||
| - muslim | - low purin | ||
| - oriental asian | - child | ||
| - hindu | - bland | ||
| - low fat cholesterol | - low calorie |
Maybe these choices are available on Expedia as well (that’s the service I typically use to book personal travel). If they are, I hadn’t noticed them until now.
In any case, questions abound: Am I the only one who remembers when airline meals were offered as regular, vegetarian or (maybe) kosher? And what if I’m a lactose intolerant Hindu who wants a vegetarian meal that’s low in sodium, cholesterol and protein? Can we do combinations here? Doesn’t that come to billions of potential meals? What in blazes is “purin?” And does anyone intentionally order a “bland” meal, or is that just a complaint lodged after the fact?
Inquiring minds want to know!
Categories: The World Wide Weird | 3 Comments »
Maintenance-Free Pets
Friday, March 6th, 2009Via Speculist, we present an invention for people who have a dog, but don’t really want to have a dog:
Categories: The World Wide Weird | 2 Comments »
Bike, Skate, Ball?
Sunday, March 1st, 2009
I took my kids to McDonald’s the other day, and this graphic was on their Happy Meal bag.
Bike, Skate, Ball? I realize I’m a thousand years old by today’s kids’ standards, but have items like Rock, Paper and Scissors become so outdated that kids won’t recognize them anymore?
Categories: The World Wide Weird | 3 Comments »
This isn’t helping…
Tuesday, February 17th, 2009Categories: The World Wide Weird | 1 Comment »
Hacking Road Signs…
Sunday, February 8th, 2009OK, so apparently, the latest rage is hacking into those orange and black electronic road signs you see once in a while, and changing the message to something clever or ironic. This, for instance, is kind of funny:
But this, on the other hand, is freakin’ hilarious:
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Toys of the Times
Sunday, January 18th, 2009From Amazon.com (hat tip: Willow Gross):
Click through to the Amazon page and read the comments. They are priceless as well. Here’s a snippet from my favorite:
I was a little disappointed when I first bought this item, because the functionality is limited. My 5 year old son pointed out that the passenger’s shoes cannot be removed. Then, we placed a deadly fingernail file underneath the passenger’s scarf, and neither the detector doorway nor the security wand picked it up. My son said “that’s the worst security ever!”. But it turned out to be okay, because when the passenger got on the Playmobil B757 and tried to hijack it, she was mobbed by a couple of other heroic passengers, who only sustained minor injuries in the scuffle, which were treated at the Playmobil Hospital.
Classic…
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The new “Got Milk?” Campaign?
Tuesday, January 13th, 2009This from the excellent photo-blog, Incredimazing:
This is not a humorous topic, of course, but I must admit to smiling when I saw this picture. First of all, anything that makes hateful people look stupid is a step in the right direction, as far as I’m concerned. Second, I just love the fact that he thought he could clarify his error by writing the word “Zionist” in parentheses above the word “Juice.” So now, instead of just misspelling “Jews,” he’s create the concept of Zionist Juice, which I presume is made by squeezing Zionists really hard? And not only that, he’s against Zionist Juice, which I’m guessing is the opposite of the message he’s trying to convey. Ah, sweet linguistic justice…
Anyway, sorry if this offends anyone, but I thought it was hilarious.
Categories: The World Wide Weird | 2 Comments »
Random Acts of Blogging – 1/9/09
Saturday, January 10th, 2009Happy New Year to all! We start off 2009 here at I Should Be Sleeping with a random smattering of things I’ve seen since New Year’s that I thought you’d find fascinating:
First, there’s Burger King. Last month, we discussed their new meat-scented cologne. Now, they’ve gone hi-tech. The Whopper Sacrifice
Categories: Family Matters, Money Talk, Political Rantings, Random Acts of Blogging, The World Wide Weird | No Comments »
From the Crew – Behind the Scenes Cruise Stories
Tuesday, December 30th, 2008OK, one more Disney post and then I’ll stop – I promise.
This one is courtesy of a side conversation with some of the Disney Wonder’s fantastic crew staff. It’s the Top Ten Crazy Things People Say on Cruise Ships. All, I am assured, are true stories:
10. Do these stairs go up?
9. Will this elevator take me to the front of the ship?
8. [While viewing the hundreds of photos the crew staff takes of you during the cruise and then tries to sell you later] How do I know which pictures are mine?
7. Does the crew staff live on-board the ship?
6. [When a chronic complainer who asked #7 was told that no, in fact, a helicopter picks them up every night at 1AM and they commute] I’d like to register a complaint – the helicopter that picked the crew up last night at 1AM made so much noise, it woke me up.
5. [Right after boarding the ship and going to his stateroom, but before the ship left port] I’d like my money back. I asked for a room with a “Sea View,” and when I go out on my veranda, all I can see is the parking lot!
4. [on Castaway Cay, Disney's private island] Will this tram take me to the Animal Kingdom Park? [n.b., Animal Kingdom is one of the parks in Disney World - in Orlando, Florida].
3. Disney really should have told me there was no casino on board – I’m very disappointed.
**Numbers 2 and 1 redacted because they are too dumb to mention here…
(Actually, I only had eight, but who ever heard of a “Top Eight” list? Damn Letterman…)
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