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Paris Hilton Speaks at Harvard

By Brian | February 11, 2008 | Share on Facebook

Oh, wow – this story has so many ironic twists in it, I just had to post about it.
(Hat tip: Yvette Aikens)

First of all, Harvard’s Lampoon magazine declared Paris Hilton the “Woman of the Year.”.

Next, upon hearing about the award, Paris Hilton agrees to come to Harvard and accept the tropy in person. Apparently, she doesn’t know (and nobody told her) what the word Lampoon means.

Then, it’s raining on the day of the event, and about 200 Harvard students wait more than an hour in the rain to see her.

Next, Lampoon’s president, Chris Schleicher, is accused of pulling a prank. He has to stave off an increasing wet and impatient crowd by saying, “All of you can stab me if she doesn’t come. She’s really coming.”

But, of course, this is Harvard, so intelligent discourse eventually provides the proper perspective. First, we have Matthew Sussman, a 26-year old English major who says, “Someone just accosted me and said, ‘Why would you stand in the rain for Paris Hilton?’ But I think that she is an icon and we see her image multiplied numerous times and numerous ways.” Good point, Matthew. Good point. Matthew also added, “It’s also a dubious distinction. We don’t know if she is in on the joke or not,” proving that he’s not a total idiot.

Then Paris finally arrived and provided the student the kind of intellectual red meat you’d expect from such a weighty mind: “You guys are so hot. Harvard’s hot.”

I smell commencement speech…

Topics: The World Wide Weird | 2 Comments »

2 Responses to “Paris Hilton Speaks at Harvard”

  1. Anonymous says at April 1st, 2008 at 2:48 pm :
    This is all too obscure. Did this really happen?

  2. Brian says at April 2nd, 2008 at 12:03 pm :
    Sadly, yes, it did.

    Click on the link in the post!

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