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Bike, Skate, Ball?

By Brian | March 1, 2009 | Share on Facebook

I took my kids to McDonald’s the other day, and this graphic was on their Happy Meal bag.

Bike, Skate, Ball? I realize I’m a thousand years old by today’s kids’ standards, but have items like Rock, Paper and Scissors become so outdated that kids won’t recognize them anymore?  Do we really need to “update” them with Bikes, Skates and Balls?

And what’s with these rules? In my day, it at least made some sense: a piece of paper would cover a rock; a rock would break a pair of scissors (if you hit them hard enough, I suppose); and scissors would cut the paper.

But “Skate beats ball?” How, exactly? I certainly wouldn’t want to be skating if someone threw a ball at my skates. Although, I guess, if you were a good skater, you could kick the ball away. But then, “Ball beats (bi)cycle?” What kind of ball are we talking about here? One that can defeat a bicycle, but is powerless against a skate? And then, finally, “(Bi)cycle beats Skate.” That doesn’t even make any sense!

I consider myself pretty accepting of change in most cases, but some things in life just don’t need to be improved. Rock, Paper, Scissors seems like one of those things to me.

Now get off my lawn!!!

Topics: The World Wide Weird | 3 Comments »

3 Responses to “Bike, Skate, Ball?”

  1. Jeff Porten says at March 2nd, 2009 at 2:49 am :
    How about: Bike, Skate, Ball is probably now copyrighted and owned by McDonald’s, whereas RPS is public domain?

    Otherwise completely agreed with you, except that “paper covers rock” always struck me as a serious copout. More like “paper rests on rock for 45 milliseconds before being disturbed by a breeze.”

  2. Konstantin says at March 2nd, 2009 at 10:38 am :
    in one of the episodes of Big Bang Theory, they devised a Rock Paper Scissors Lizardman Vulcan variety :)

  3. jason says at March 2nd, 2009 at 5:13 pm :
    Bike/Skate/Ball? WTF?

    While I know Jeff’s explanation is probably pretty close to the truth, I’ve got to admit this baffles me. Why would you recreate a bit of classic playground folklore that probably dates back to Chaucer’s time? The really sad thing is, there are some kids that are going to take this to heart and then be completely baffled when they encounter the “real” game somewhere on down the road. Damn McDonald’s is screwing with a natural generational progression!


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